The Intentional Timeline

🕰️ A Guide for the Betrayed Partner

A path to healing and clarity that protects your heart while giving your marriage a real chance.

✍️ Step 1: Understand the Purpose of This Timeline

This is not a countdown.This is not “let’s see if it’s worth it.”This is you saying:“I believe in the possibility of restoration, and I’m willing to invest this amount of time—not because I’m naïve, but because I’ve decided this is what I can give in love and strength without betraying myself.”It’s not a trap or a test. It’s a container for clarity, boundaries, and growth.

🧠 Step 2: Ask Yourself the Hard Question

“If nothing changes by the end of this, will I regret giving this time?”If the answer is yes, you’ve set the timeline too long.If the answer is no—if even worst-case scenario, you’d be proud of how you showed up—then you’ve chosen well.

📆 Step 3: Define the Length of Time You Can Give

(Choose based on your emotional, spiritual, and physical capacity.)

🔲 90 days🔲 6 months🔲 1 year🔲 Other: ___________

💬 Step 4: Define What You’re Looking For Within That Time

Not perfection. Not a full comeback. But movement. Intention. Growth.Answer these prompts:- In this amount of time, I need to see...  (Examples: consistent truth-telling, effort in therapy, spiritual leadership, no contact with affair partner, emotional availability, remorse, protection, etc.)- These would be signs of real change:  (List behaviors, actions, patterns you’ll watch for)- These would be red flags that indicate no growth:  (List non-negotiables or signs that tell you they’re not participating)

🕊️ Step 5: Go In With This Heartset

- “I’m not here to punish. I’m here to observe.”- “I’m not demanding change—I’m giving space for it.”- “If growth happens, I’ll be present. If it doesn’t, I’ll be proud of how I showed up.”- “God can work with my faith and my boundaries. This timeline honors both.”

🔁 Step 6: Review Regularly

Set a recurring checkpoint with yourself:- Weekly: How am I feeling?- Monthly: Is my heart still in this?- End of timeline: What’s changed? What hasn’t? What do I need now?